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My Best Beloved

Story of a wallflower and how she found her people amidst her turmoil senses

EPISODE 1-

Sugar, Spice and Everything nice

It was a bright day and the sunshine was peeking through the glass windows of my room; touching my feet covered up in the thick blanket of my faded dreams. I woke up with a quest for a new life and with that was a mindfulness of varying motivation and fears of meeting new people.

Leaving previous school, fond memories and mostly my dear Grandpre’s sweet home, was somewhat not acceptable though I wasn’t much rebellious. I was living with them from the age of 3 until now, my parents decided to have me back in their small-roomed apartment in the hub of the city. I was a part of their system for more than my childhood and thereby had to give up a piece of their combined heart when they decided to let me live with my parents. All of a sudden my earth was still and then started spinning with the speed of my reckless insanity. Soaking in all the pain, I embarked on a new beginning, a new period. Because, some decisions are to be made for the better extension of life, whether your heart accepts it or not. The twist here was a bitter one but the turn was necessary for my own self.

By the time I was ready for my school, my mother was all set with her ‘made with love’ breakfast. I quickly grabbed a sandwich, hugged her to inhale her positivity and rushed to start my day. “At least finish your breakfast”. “I don’t have time, mom. I am so late.” I took my bicycle and peddled through the not-so-busy road and finally reached my destination within, uh, 15 minutes. I tapped on my watch (a departing present from my grandpa).

I have been the center of attraction for my family with two parents and grandparents but i always felt the need of a sibling who could be my constant in this wonder-winged city. A person who would hold my hands when in unison; who would have shared my emotions and recovered me from the heaviness of my long past dawn. May be, this was the only reason that i could not find people to connect; to dive into the deep crevices of classic books and the authors fanatical world. I crave for an escape at this early age and that’s nothing absurd. Because the empty space within us speaks volume and it do not rest until it finds something good to hold on to.

The decision of leaving them wasn’t easy but i had to find peace with the conclusion. For may, be, there would always be a void within me that would crave for attention. But a little part of me believes in sunshine, a hope of emerging out of my little cocoon of silence and stillness. I wait for that one golden light that would one day, bring me solace and render me the bliss of solitude, draped in my own black silk.

I was so lost in my thoughts that i couldn’t guess my own riding speed and that i was already into the campus. When I reached, I wasn’t sure enough of how to commence on my first ever steps into the new phase of my life. Oh my God, The big high school is here!  But my inner voice was whispering then, “May the force be with you, Girl”. Putting the bicycle on stand, I took the courage to face the day.

When I entered, it was an empty classroom, I sat in a bench just near the corridor to check on other students.The benches were eventually getting full and as time elapsed there were slow settlements of the students and with that new subjects and respective teachers came into play one after another.

I had a very satisfying record of academics so far and was really looking forward for a better outlook where the only barrier stands my communication skill. A wallflower with the smell of bluestocking. I was basically the girl, with little conversations but will talk her heart out, once well connected. And for that, even in the mid of my lectures, I was searching for any random, wondering pair of eyes but disappointed at my flop attempts, I got back to focus on my class.

During the recess, I made no further trials but kept staring at the blackboard, trying to restore my senses that has been blazed by the very shining abode of people around. I knew by then, my habitat was replaced by some domain of super-chaos. Before I could further react to whatever happening around me, I managed to get over half of the day in good time.

By the end of the day, I was standing by my locker stand when I caught the site of a group of boys, dressed in black jerseys (Gangsters-in–Uniform). Among them was this boy who looked so hot and wanted that his gaze was enough to invade into the lacey dreams of every teen girl. I could well analyze that every eye in the hallway was in motion by then and was telling a personalized story. He was moving in a swift-slow motion towards the nearest common room and at that very instant, my eyes abruptly locked with his and I couldn’t think twice. Honestly, my heart skipped a beat.

“Stop drooling. That’s a person not a snack!”. Whoa !

It took a lot more than a second to reverse the effect. I turned back assuming, I was just talking to myself but then there she was, dressed up in her jeans and over sized LEVIS white t-shirt, looking just so obvious at me as if she was raiding my concealment.

“Excuse me. I wasn’t drooling.” Oh boy !

“Yeah, you were, we all were. But never mind” she winked. ” So, are you new here?”

“Um, yes, it’s my first day here.” Not-so-nervously, I replied.

“And you look super nervous with a pretty face. I saw you sitting in a blank classroom and I would give a penny to know your thoughts.” “Anyway, I am Jenna Walder, nice to meet you…..?” extending her hand towards me, she raised her eyebrows  for like one-fifth of the second  to make a quick query.

“Hi, Emily Coulson” OK, making connection, good! “….and by the way, I wasn’t thinking anything. Just scheduling the day in my thoughtless mind” still shaking hands.

“You mean preparing for the audience here”. She winked again with a giggle, pointing at the boys common room.

“Um, noooo, I am not interested in them. I was just… curious, you know. Why are they all dressed like that, in same…..um….colors?”

“Oh, they are gangsters, belonging to the same brotherhood”

I couldn’t blink and was gaping at her absent minded. Like what? Gangsters?

With no apparent reason, Jenna started laughing at my expression without even looking at my face as if she knew what my reaction would be.  And at once I knew, I was busted.

“Damn Girl, why so serious?” “No, they aren’t Gangsters and neither are they some fallen angels”. “They belong to the high school baseball team. And that’s Mark Felton, who made you fall from your spotless position of safe heaven.”

Phew !

I couldn’t resist myself laughing at my own self and at her, too. She was funny and friendly and by then i was guessing her to be  just the person I wanted to meet. One person a day, there goes my goal, Yup.

We talked for some while about so many things until we reached the entrance of our separation. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, Emily. It was nice to know you and I hope you‘ll love to meet my friends who’ll be joining us very soon. They are weird, fun and just the dose of people you’ll need to live here. Stay tuned babes. Cia”. Jenna assured.

OK. Friends? As in more than one?

“Great, bring them on!”. Jenna was vibing my fear over the subject but she let that pass with a gentle squeeze on my arm.

So, my first day at high school was over, not that bad, and I made a FRIEND. 

Back to home, I was back to being me. Old school, home driven, a typical introvert, book worm with a report card of one person recorded. As I entered, I saw my Mom sitting on the big couch in the drawing room. As she saw me approaching, she stood up for me in a warm reception.“How’s your day, honey? Did you make friends?”

The anticipations of a classic over-dramatic mother were hovering by then. She is a warm heart-ed, one-of-her-kind person who has always tried to comfort me with her cheerfulness and support. She is my second world after my grandparents, indeed.

A Friend, Mom. And it was a normal day with no adventures added. Just my type! But for now the one thing you need to know is that my stomach’s rumbling of hunger.” She laughed and went back to the kitchen to get me something to eat. I managed to overlook the coming conversation with that point. But in no time she was back with a quick toast and started comforting me with her probabilities.“I am sure, you’ll soon get through it and make things around you comfortable enough to stay, my love”.

In no time, i leaned into her shoulder, embracing her love and utmost care. She was smiling then and emitting her good radiations while brushing aside my hair locks. To a mother, you will always be a little girl.

After dinner, i was back to my room and was preparing for my next steps. I was into making my notes as usual and writing an essay for my first assignment. A voracious reader and a quick learner; with my average look, that serves as the first aid to my morale. The night was silent but my mind wasn’t.  By the time I was in my bed, it was already cooking some recipes of eternal wonders over a person, Mark Felton. He’s so handsome and haunting that the trial of my senses was now bleeding for an inconvenient attachment. All of a sudden, I was pretty much into sharing seasons of my sensuous delight.

Is this what they call, having a Crush?

 

Next episode- Calling Infatuation…

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the_wildfire

The writer, Bipasha Banik aka the_wildfire, is a voracious reader and writes her heart out with pen dipping into the inkwell of fantasy and radiates diversified vibes. The wildfire is composed of weekend poetries, short stories and random curated insights. Ensuring beauty with chaos, she is a blogger sitting at the corridor of life , writing her regular ramblings while travelling dimensions of thoughts. Just not easy being her !

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